"Peace cannot be kept by force. It can only be achieved by understanding."

I suppose that it is normal for any parent in our situation to seek guidance, knowledge and a sense of understanding, right? Right! Albert Einstein said "Peace cannot be kept by force. It can only be achieved by understanding." this weekend I found my peace by understanding the frustrating fact that I am not in control of William's treatment schedule, therefor I am not in charge of the ever changing treatment calendar that inevitably schedules and manages every aspect of our lives.

During the course of the past 100 hours William's surgery had been cancelled and reschedules multiple times, William was diagnosed with having the BK virus, we were discharged and readmitted to the hospital, drove home to El Dorado where we were able to spend the day with Randell and then finally, this morning at 8am, William had his procedure to place the femoral artery line.

William is on day 14 of his Neupogen injections and still his numbers are not yet high enough to begin the stem cell collection process. At the start of this process we were made aware of the fact that there were no gaurantees, and we knew that it would not be an easy process but, the magnitude and full understanding of the difficulties involved really only became realistically obvious to me this morning when I realized that the femoral artery line was being placed with a 50/50 chance that William's tired little bone marrow will not be able to provide us with the amount of stem cells needed - I briefly lost my composure and had a mommy moment...

William is now out of surgery and heavily medicated. He wil be returned to his room shortly where we will wait for the BMT (bone marrow transplant) Team to stop by and discuss possible backup plans with us. From what I know, there is a possibility that if the stem cell rescue process fails, they will need to collect actual bone marrow from him; however, the problem with that is the history of cancer in the actual bone marrow- I am not really sure what the back up plan is for the back up plan .

The discovery of the BK virus in the bladder provides a whole new set of treatment plans, side effects to manage, time lines to meet and risks to beware off. I just need to keep reminding myself that everything happens for a reason, and that we have already made it through so much, we can handle a few more curve balls.

I will update the blog again tomorrow, hopefully with positive news.

Keep on keepin' on
Live Strong in God's promise of healing!