2 years

It's been 2 years since William got diagnosed. No, this is not a day that I am celebrating but it is a day that I will allways remember.

William is doing well. All things considered, he is doing really well. He still argues with his grandma. He still gets frustrated with me when we play Xbox together, he still loves being outside with the dogs and his BB Gun, he is still passionately obsessed with airplanes, and most importantly - he is still my funny, kind, caring, cuddle searching, mischief finding, curious Sir William.

Being home is wonderful, but equally challenging. We take our daily challenges as they present themselves and often wonder about our decisions and their future impact. I still believe that our decision to come home was the right decision, even if it does present some unexpected hurdles. As always, Randell has been loving, protective, realistic and soothing - somehow he instinctively knows when I am about to crack, and reminds me that William is still here, we still have the now, we can still hug him, love him, kiss him, and surround ourselves with his laughter. Its easy to get caught up in the anger and the questions that surround our current situation, but I decided to not be bitter or filled with anger. Yes, I hurt. Yes, I cry. Yes, I have moments of terror. But I refuse to contaminate my precious time left with William with negative emotions. If there is one thing I know for sure, it's that my child feeds off of the emotional action and reaction of others. When we are calm and at peace, he is too. When we are crying and angry, he becomes withdrawn and somber. When his pain flairs up it's easy panic and stress, but I have learned that soothing words, distractions, calm actions and slow/deliberate reactions result in William's calm and more cooperative behavior.

In reading William's blogs from the past 24 months I am reminded of so many memories, challenges we overcame and friends that we have made. If I knew 24 months ago what I know today, I would still make the same decisions! I don't regret any of them. My son fought a brave, brave battle and even though he will be in heaven soon, I know that he has lived more, accomplished more, touched more hearts, and shown more love than most adults ever do! When William's journey has come to an end, I ask that none of you ever say that he lost his battle with cancer, because he did not. He won his battle against cancer! He never allowed cancer to dictate his level of laughter, his passion for airplanes, his love in others, or his joy of life! William beat cancer because even after everything he has endured, he still loved and laughed unconditionally and without reserve. William beat cancer because even though the tumors may have claimed his body, the ugliness of cancer never tainted the essence of who he is and always will be.

Loiss